How to get hip - in Igbo

First we must focus our minds on the latest mind-boggling findings of the Obscure Cancer Research Brigade with this revelation from the UK's Southampton University, as told by the Daily Mail:

"Women whose mothers have wide hips could be seven times more likely to develop breast cancer, researchers have warned. A study of thousands of women has revealed a clear link between the two."

No, really? Well, the explanation is simple enough...

"Prof Barker, of Southampton University, an internationallyrenowned medical researcher, said: 'A women's hip size is a marker of her oestrogen production. Wide, round hips represent markers of high sex hormone concentrations in the mother, which increase her daughter's vulnerability to breast cancer.'"

Ah, got that. Now. Does having a long nose mean your second cousin is more likely to get melanoma? Or if you have a big bottom, that your sons' nephews are more prone to rectal cancer? Am I being utterly cynical, or is there something vaguely funny about all this? Click here for the remainder of the story.

On to my most recent meet with my lovely Nigerian urologist. We were running over my recent "poke and peek" history for the benefit of Angela, a delightful nurse I've known for some time through other things and who has now taken up the reins as the urology/oncology nurse specialist.

"Yes," said Mr Uro. "The first time we did a cystoscopy I had to try four scopes before I found one that worked properly."

"I know," I chuckled. "I certainly learned some new swear words that day."

Mr Uro's eyes widened. "Oh, God, you were awake, weren't you? That's right, you'd had an epidural anaesthetic. I'm so sorry..."

"Don't worry," I assured him. "I knew all of the words in English. It's just the ones in Igbo that I didn't understand..."

More on that exciting cystoscopy in the archive, here.

Finally, if you should happen to be a member of Ecademy - the international online social and business networking platform - you may be interested to know that I have started a Cancer Club on there. Unlike this blog which is devoted largely to the lighter moments, Cancer Club is for more serious debate. It's a private club, too, so only members can view posts.

To learn more about Ecademy, click here, and to see the Cancer Club home page, click here.

Love to all

SUZE